The Girl Who Learned To Kneel

FOR THE WEEK OF JUNE 7-13

WHAT I’M READING: Various plays which I am reading critically as I ponder my own. I started with Joan MacLeod’s Shape of a Girl, a one woman show about an angry teen obsessed with girl on girl violence. I will now shift my attention to writing homeschooling curriculum so Elsie never has to leave the house.

WHAT ELSIE’S READING: Nothing. This week she’s more about the standing. In fact, ALL she wants to do is stand. Standing is her delight. And if she could do it without holding on to the ottoman or Mama’s knee or baskets that tip and give her a bloody lip, she would be hysterical (the good kind).

WHAT I’M WATCHING: Quantum of Solace. I prefer to not do a tally of the people Bond murdered. It takes away from the pleasure of the genre.

WHAT I’M LISTENING TO: K’naan. I’m not kidding when I say his music makes me feel powerful. His lyrics are intelligent and hilarious, and he’s such a great example of overcoming…

I wave my hands out the window (okay, not both hands, ’cause that would make driving really awkward) and encourage Elsie to sing along, until she begs pitifully for the return of her music. I don’t understand, Elsie ’cause K’naan loves rhyme more than you.

WHAT I’M WEARING: I could tell you about my animal print maternity bra that is so big now it rides up my chest like an awkward tank top, yet so comfortable I wear it anyway. Which might be why when I showed up at a friend’s house looking half-way decent (even a belt), she did a double take: “You look nice??”

WHAT I’M EATING: Same old. Same old. I’m in a cooking slump. Please share your tasty recipes.

WHAT I’M ENJOYING: Not being Jeff’s nanny. You see, I almost gave myself up to the service of little Jeff and his family when in a stupor I detailed a nanny profile on nannynanny.ca. It’s best if I’m not near a computer when I start to feel desperate about my choices, ’cause then I start filling in my email here, here, and here. What do I have to do to make money? Oh yeah? Sign me up. Until I realize that I don’t actually want to do that. Then I have to spend a week reclaiming my artistic vision. It’s an arduous cycle.

WHAT I’M SNIFFING: I can tell you what I’m not sniffing. My deodorant. I found a Life brand natural deodorant for $3.47. You would think I was a bargain hunter or something. Never mind that it works like crap. There is something to that aluminum…