The Girl Who Learned To Kneel

Dear Elsie,

You are just over 8 weeks old and turning into quite the smiler. And as much as I want you to be a people person comfortable with everyone, I admit to a cosy feeling when the smiles are particularly for me. I am your food source after all, which puts me in a certain position of esteem. You do have a reverence for your mama’s breast. And in turn your mama.

We take naps together. And you’re starting to do this little ‘squint check’ to make sure I’m still there. One time I slipped out of the bed like a maverick (or so I thought) and you flipped your lid when you realized you were alone. I’m sorry that you felt abandoned. I will no longer unfurl myself from our cuddle to mop the floor. Screw the floor! Bollocks on the floor! (Okay, I don’t think I’ve EVER mopped the floor. And Simon says that’s an incorrect usage of ‘bollocks.’)

You also have a strong aversion to the multitasking Daddy and I attempt. You will have none of this pretending to pay attention to you. You like our undivided attention. I get that, Little Girl and I am doing my best to respect your needs.

I have a couple things to apologize for: I opened a bathroom door into your head, and just when you had forgiven me, I opened another door into your arm. Oh, I felt like a very bad mama. I smothered you with kisses and did a thorough scan of your skull and extremities. Everything seemed to be in order. But my guilt was large.

Today you rolled off Daddy’s chest and you didn’t like that at all. You communicated your unhappiness for a while causing Daddy to grow a few more white hairs. His guilt was even larger.

But all in all these litle mishaps are quite uncommon. Basically we are natural parents or that’s what we tell ourselves. It’s part of our positive self-talk, Kitten. We love it when you’re a happy cat and we do everything we can to keep you in that state! In fact, Daddy is sterilizing breast pumping equipment as we speak, so he can feed you a bottle and I can leave the house for longer than three hours. It’s for your own good. I had a bit of a melt down last night and this was our solution. We certainly are problem solvers.

In conclusion, you are lovely to look at and Martin at the grocery store continues to marvel at your fantastic complexion. We couldn’t agree more. As my grade seven student wrote: “She is so stinkin cute Mme Davey.”

See Elsie Pelsie. I may be be your mama, but I’m also someone’s madame. What do you think of that?

Love love,

Mama